I couldn't hold my tongue once more

I wish all consequences of what I said, of what I carelessly wrote to her last night in spite of all warnings and symptoms I felt, were confined entirely to my own world alone; such that the other would not be affected by it at all. Such that if I was to expose myself to her, which I never ever should do it again, she would have taken it with a smile wondering what the heck I am talking about. But now this thought is merely what consoles me though impossible, impossible. No matter how much, the consequences will leak my world and affect the other and will reveal itself in time.

I couldn't hold my tongue once more. I couldn't restrain myself in what had to be kept silently within. I could have just been content with what she had written on her email, been content, in the long nights of loneliness, with this sweet thought that a dear one thought is with me. I could simply not.